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Waiting for retirement
Hi, I'm Pierre, 27, living in Berlin, and I'm looking for English and German speaking people so I can improve my mediocre language skills.
Who am I kidding ?
I'm actually Earl, 62 years old, bald and morbidly obese, trying to dupe some naive young girls in the sole purpose of raping them in a dark wood.
No seriously, I'm really Pierre, and my Tibetan name is Minflohnaï, which means "The great golden Pangolin made of beer".
I was born in an aircraft, at the exact instant we were crossing the Brazil-Swiss border.
So basically I have the Brazilian nationality but also the Swiss one.
I am the son of the Dailai Lama, but he disowned me (people think the Dailai Lama is all peace and love, but actually he's not) and was raised by a yak who gave me all the milk, heat, and love I needed, while my adoptive father (Yeti) was busy frightening some tourists for fun.
One day, a French expedition in Tibet, willing to study cheese made from yak's milk, found me. The expedition leader, Arnold Schwarzenegger, killed my parents (he needed a new carpet for his living room and everyone know that yeti have silky hairs), and decided to bring me back to France, a country he was the president, because he thought my life will be too miserable in a country without frogs, wine, women with hairy armpits, baguettes, and strikes.
That's basically how I end up in Paris.
Why I’m on Couchsurfing
HOW I PARTICIPATE IN COUCHSURFING
Mostly by going to the events and not talking to anyone there because I'm too shy, unless I'm very drunk but it's kind of rare these days, so most of the time I just observe people. It can be pretty entertaining.
But I actually love talking to other people, so don't be put off by my antipathetic look and false impression of boredom and come talk to me!
BTW I like offensive topics so you don't have to ask some usual question like "where do you come from?" or shit like that, I prefer questions like "are you in favor of eugenics" or "do you believe in free will".
If you didn't get the chance to talk to me at one of these meetings, you can still send me a message now with your most offensive question.
Science, Transhumanism, Roller skating, Jellyfishes, Reading, Sleeping, Anal sex with chickens.
And cheese. People who think heroine is the most addictive substance on earth probably never tried cheese.
I'm also an artist as I've been drawing for 14 years. You can see some of my work in my pictures, there's not a lot because each one takes severals months to complete.
One Amazing Thing I’ve Done
I was born, once.
It was pretty tiring and all I could think of was going back to that warm and quiet place, which, while a bit dark, was pretty comfy.