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  • 6 References 1 Confirmed & Positive
  • Fluent in Mapudungun; learning English, German, Spanish
  • 58, Male
  • Member since 2009
  • Australian Gentleman Ha!
  • Diploma of Agriculture; BA (Journalism/German)
  • No hometown listed
  • Profile 65% complete

About Me


To save the world from myself.


Officially I'm the world's only Living Saint. Though I look like an angel, I'm not. I'm actually a High Priest in the Church of Hypocrisy preaching water while guzzling wine.

When not practising Heavy Drinking For Journalists, I am working on a bestseller which will re-write the history of WWII. But not the result.

After that I will edit the Bible into tabloid format: Did God score with a virgin? Was Jesus the first man in space? Adam & Eve - stop ribbing me. Sodom & Gomorrah - DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME. How to turn water into wine. Easy . . . learn to spell.

Then I will update the Kama Sutra and correct errors in Einstein's Theory of Relativity. Everyone's warped, not just time and space.

STRENGTHS: As an ex-fighter pilot, multiple Nobel Prize winner and serial Olympic gold medallist, I AM SICK AND TIRED OF BULLSHIT ARTISTS.

WEAKNESSES (if any): way too shy, far too modest, much too humble.

Now if that ain't practising what I preach.


"What good I can do, therefore let me do it, for I shall not pass this way again." French Quaker missionary Stephen Grellet.

"What we know is a drop, what we don't know is an ocean." Sir Isaac Newton

Right thoughts; respect; non-violence and non-materialism. Siddharta Guatama (Buddha)

Why I’m on Couchsurfing


Recruiting for Alcoholics Anonymous.


Have not got my wings yet.


Drinking Earl Grey tea in the morning after a hard night's drinking, reading, talking, relaxing, dreaming, sleeping, making mistakes, learning, etc etc.

Travelling the path less taken. Long-distance cycling. Avoiding work- it's a complete waste of time. I've got better things to do.

  • wine
  • drinking
  • reading
  • traveling
  • cycling
  • rock climbing
  • history
  • languages

Music, Movies, and Books


- Great voices (Harry Secombe's arias! Maddy Prior, Elvis etc). Calming classical music. Steppenwolf's "Get your motor running." Bagpipes. The sound of railway locomotives.

- Great speeches/rhetoric (Churchill, Kennedy et al).

- Great movies ( Chaplin's "The Great Dictator").

- Great writing (Bertrand Russell on religion, Marc Aurel's "Self Reflections"; Viktor Klemperer's "LTI" (misuse of the German language in the Third Reich) etc etc

One Amazing Thing I’ve Done

Climbed Mt Everest backwards in a wheelchair with both arms broken and no brakes.

Discovered the spice chile in Mexico before Colombus. With a tad of this atomic herb, I can eat boots, truck tyres and concrete pylons. Chile eyedrops are great too.

Teach, Learn, Share

GREAT GURUS: Polish President Lech Walesa.

I once interviewed Lech Walesa in his Gdansk office. Before he angrily turfed me back out on the street, I asked the great Solidarity leader what he thought of prostitution after his son had been caught in nearby Gdynia's magnificent three-storey "Bodega" brothel.

"We must fight good with evil," said Walesa.

Walesa's non-stop barrage of legendary homespun wisdoms had so confused the translator she got his reply back-to-front. Crazier still, Walesa even manages to confuse himself. As President of Poland, Walesa promised to slash the cost of living by 100%. Against Walesa, communism never stood a chance.

Background info to the infamous Walesa-Bodega story:

Bodega's website is:

Bodega's advertising slogan in English runs, "Bodega is a place you need." Unfortunately for Walesa's son, it was the last thing he needed. His marriage went to the wall and the Warsaw press had a field day brandishing the magnificent headline: WALESA IN BROTHEL.

Bodega's marriage-destroying slogan has been lost in translation. In German it reads: Bodega - ein Platz für dich! = Bodega, the place for you!

In Polish it reads: Bodega to miejsce, ktorego szukasz = Bodega, this is the place you are looking for.

Unfortunately for Walesa's son, he found it, spent all his money on wine and women and left his driver's license behind as a guarantee he'd cough up the zlotys. A Bodega employee could not resist the temptation of calling Warsaw's gutter press and the rest is divorce court history.

Moral to the story: honesty does not pay.

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